When it comes to navigating the different relationships in life, friends play a very important role. Especially in a situation wherein you catch your friend’s boyfriend cheating on her. What do you do? How do you deal? Do you march right up to him and give him a piece of your mind? Or do you call your friend right away and tell her what’s going on—then send her a photo of what you had just witnessed as proof?
It seems simple enough, but when you think about it. There are repercussions along the way. Here’s what these Pinays would do if they found themselves in that situation.
Confronting the guy
Marica Llenado would tell her friend if she knew her boyfriend was cheating on her. However, she would do something else as well. “I would tell the boyfriend that I know and what I think of that. Then I will tell my friend,” she says. “I will tell her boyfriend so that he knows that I know and that I’m telling her. It’s about transparency and not about giving him a chance to explain or defend himself to me. It’s so that I can give him a piece of my mind.”
Corinne Javier would also confront the guy first. “That’s assuming we’re friends,” she adds. “I wouldn’t tell my friend first because you never really know what they’re going through together because you are an outsider.”
“I’d absolutely tell my friend in a heartbeat,” says Lissa Sumpaico. “And then I’ll help her murder either her boyfriend or the girl he’s cheating with. I would never stand for a friend of mine to be made a fool of. It’ll be terrible now but no friend of mine will be burdened with an asshole in her life if I can help it.”
Sandra* agrees. “I would tell my friend about it too, and as much as I could, I would try to help her through it. She obviously needs help and who else can she turn to but her friends?”
If you choose to tell your friend, it is possible that she will hate you instead of her boyfriend. You were the bearer of bad news, after all. To this, Lissa says, “Better that she fights with me because I told her the truth rather than I sit back and do nothing and let her stupid boyfriend make a fool of her. If the situations were reversed, I’d expect my friends to tell me if they knew. So if there are guys out there cheating on my friends, they can start running!”
Marica agrees that the risk is worth taking. “My friend needs to know that her partner doesn’t value or respect her. She deserves that much from me as her friend. What follows after that—if she hates me and our friendship is ruined—is telling of the kind of friendship she and I have. And that’s another story.”
Being a friend can be difficult if you find yourself in a situation like this, but in the end, you have to ask yourself what you value the most and what would bring you and your friend peace of mind.
*her name has been changed
Yahoo! SHE asks: What would you do? Would you risk your friendship and tell your friend her boyfriend is cheating on her?
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