You’ve been with your partner a while, and things are going great but you’ve got stuck in a bit of a sexual rut. It happens to the best of us. But before you start heading for the door, we’ve got a few tips up our sleeve that might help you to spice things up.
We sort out sexpert Tracey Cox for her top 5 tips for keeping the spark alive. She’s good with this sort of thing.
Hit the books
You need three things for great long-term sex: knowledge (a good understanding of how your body and your partner's body works), experience (practice makes perfect) and the right attitude (the ability to let go of inhibitions, not judge and not worry about what you look like). These are the holy grail of sexual satisfaction.
Don’t finish where you started
While we’d love you to be treating each other to new sexual treats daily, real life often rudely intervenes to make things like work, children and household chores take priority over sex (shocking, we know.) When this happens, psychologically trick yourselves into thinking you’ve done something wild and outrageous.
Stick to the rule of not finishing where you started. This could mean you move to another room halfway through or if you start having sex in the missionary position, simply turn it around so you’re facing the opposite end of the bed.
Don’t do what you did last time
Do something you didn’t do last time you had sex: a different position, clothes on instead of off, different music. Mix it up and remember - sex should be fun!
Experiment with sex toys – and NOT just vibrators
There are some fantastic couple toys available (try looking on lovehoney.co.uk for a good variety) - bondage kits, remote control eggs, toys for him (try a stroker) and vibrators that can be worn during intercourse. Think variety, variety, variety.
Make the first move as often as possible
If you always wait for your partner to instigate sex, you’re seriously missing out. Power is a huge turn-on and nothing feels sexier than being the one unzipping the trousers and promising the earth in return for having your wicked way. Initiating sex when you don’t usually, can quick-start the most sluggish libido. Your partner’s pleasantly taken off guard, you get a buzz from being in the power position.
These rules aren’t too taxing, so will suit the laziest lover. Stick to them and you’ve got a quick fix solution to keeping things good long-term.