Open any tabloid today. Any one. Go on. What will you see?
Celebrities, hooking up, immediately after a break-up. Kim Kardashian is into Kanye West suddenly, after her just as sudden divorce (post a marriage that lasted 72 days); Ashton Kutcher, fresh from his split with Demi Moore, is allegedly living-in with Mila Kunis, the petite hot brunette from ‘Friends With Benefits’ and ‘Black Swan’.
How do they do it? How do they fall in love immediately after a break-up? Or rather why? How do they start a new relationship right after the old one goes kaput? Well, it is because it is one of the best ways to get over a heartbreak. Nothing else works as well. When you find someone that you like to be with right after a painful break-up, this new person helps you forget the pain, makes you feel better, comforted. It’s similar to being stuck in a hailstorm and then coming home to a fireplace and blanket.
After a break-up you find yourself disoriented, unstable. You might find yourself breaking down all of a sudden; find yourself getting emotional for the most trivial of things. A new person in your life brings with him/her stability, a much needed support, like a crutch when you have had a fracture. He/she boosts your confidence, your self-esteem to where it originally was, makes you happy and keeps you from doing stupid things like calling your ex after getting drunk. Falling in love right away will plug the holes and keep them from leaking.
And what if this person is the original Mr/Ms Right? What if the lessons you learned from past relationship actually help you in choosing the right partner this time around? It can happen. Your internal radar may actually lead you the perfect partner. So, go with your instinct. Just like with every relationship, don’t overanalyse. Give it time to simmer, let the colour show.
Seeing someone new right after a heartbreak is a great idea. However, make sure you take a little time off in between, like taking a break after an injury. You need some time to heal, to get back to full health, some time for yourself, to take a breather, to reflect on how the last one went and how you want the future one to go. Eventually, you will need to take some time off to resolve past relationship issues, gain some closure. When you do feel sad or hurt because of your past romance, don’t take it out on your present partner. Instead, discuss it with him/her. Be open about how you’re feeling. Remember, it’s not them, it’s you.
All in all, falling in love immediately is a wonderful thing, but just make sure you set the pace for the relationship – a pace where you don’t feel too rushed, and make sure it isn’t a rebound. So, go forth, get over the pain with a new, fresh start.
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