How to ‘date’ your husband or wife

keep the element of surprise a part of your marriage
keep the element of surprise a part of your marriage

Get to know each other

Just because you are married does not necessarily mean you know one another inside out. The big things like fears and childhood experiences are a given, but what about all those little extra nuggets of info? Things change day to day, from work to friends, family and future wishes. It’s important to still communicate all these things as if you’re just getting to know each other. Many married or long-term couples will happily sit in silence during a romantic meal instead of asking insightful questions about their partner’s day or what they have planned for the week ahead. Make an effort and don’t just settle with the information you already know about your husband or wife – there’s always more to find out.

Dress to impress

When you go on a date with your husband or wife, it’s important to still make an effort in the looks department. And that includes what you wear to bed afterwards! Admittedly what you look like is important, but really it’s not what you wear that counts, but how you wear it. The key to a good outfit is one that improves your body language. Make sure the clothes you choose fit, are comfortable and practical. There are a few little tricks you can use that may help your ‘dating’ success too. Firstly, ladies, leave your neck and your wrists bare. Guys, choose to wear fabrics like wool or silk. These soft fabrics will get your girl snuggling into you, and when she does, the soft fabric causes her brain to release oxytocin – the bonding hormone. Finally guys and girls, avoid wearing perfume. Smell is intrinsic to dating and they need a whiff of your natural scent.

Show them that you like them

We all know body language is hugely important when dating, so use it to show your ‘date’, aka your husband or wife, that you like them. Not only will this make them feel great, it will take you back to those pre-marriage fluttery moments when you first met. Women have 52 signals that tell men they’re keen, whilst guys have just 10. Ladies if you want to give him a clear message, tilt your neck to the side, lock eyes with him and touch his forearm. Or if you’re feeling really brave, touch his knee. Although cheesy, you can also subtly lick your lips. For the guys, pay attention to how you look. Checking your shirt is straight and your jacket is neat may sound odd, but preening yourself is a clear indicator that you care about the woman you’re with. Also whilst you’re listening to your date, slightly raise your eyebrows, which shows you’re really interested in what she is talking about.

Surprise them

After being together for so long you naturally become very used to one another. You know each other’s habits, likes, dislikes and mannerisms. So the next time you go on a date together try to surprise your man or woman with doing something out of character. Agree to sing karaoke in the bar you’re enjoying a quiet drink in, initiate a romantic slow-dance on your walk home or even reveal some new moves in the bedroom! Whatever you choose to do, make sure you feel relatively comfortable with it so that it comes across smoothly and confidentially and it doesn’t make your partner cringe!

Reenact the past

Nothing quite compares to that very first date. The nerves, the anticipation, the excitement. Try to recreate this magic every so often with your husband or wife to keep the passion alive. Text your partner during the day arranging your date that night, like you would if you weren’t yet officially a couple. Then comes the attention to detail; can you recreate the outfit you wore for your first date? Perhaps go the same cinema or restaurant? Or how about playing ‘your song’ that’s special to you both? If this isn’t enough to relight the fire then we don’t know what is! Read more on getwed.com...
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