Nothing compares to the sensuous, seductive caress of a woman; that perfume that gets you heady; the way their soft hands feel in yours; the way those soft, luscious lips feel on your cheeks; the way that fabric hugs their figure.
There is nothing that beats it. They have to simply walk past us in those shiny heels to get us swooning and sighing. It doesn't take much for them to floor us.
But we all know how despite being God's most wonderful creation, they can get to us with those annoying habits of theirs. Those habits that make us tear our hair out. If only women would get rid of these, we will have nothing to complain about, ever. Here are some of them:
1. It's nothing
When in the middle of a sentence, you stop short and say, "I wanted to tell you something, but never mind, it's nothing", we immediately get danger signs popping up left and right. Here's what you actually come across as saying.
a) I don't think you're capable enough of understanding what I was going to say
b) I don't want to share this information with you, I'd rather do it with someone else
c) I have other important things to do, so goodbye.
2. Yap, yap, yap
God, can you women folk talk! We're perfectly okay as long as you're yapping away with your girlfriends. We don't know where you find endless things to talk about, but, we're sorry, we cannot spend five hours on the phone with you. It not only heats up our ears, it sort of nibbles at our brains. If only you'd shut up and listen to us every now and then. Whoever said you're good listeners? You're only just waiting to start off with your story the moment there is a second's silence in the conversation.
3. I don't know you
"You know everything about me, but I hardly know a thing about you," is your common grouse. Now whose fault is that? Did we ask you to tell us every damn thing about your life? Did we come and ask you about every family member in your family and their quirks? If you voluntarily offer information, it is not mandatory, we do the same. And if you think you don't know us, place a hot seat and shoot with the questions, as long as it comes with a guarantee for some action by the end of it.
4. Waterworks
When you bring out the waterworks, that's when you really get to us. Is there a reason you cry at the bat of an eyelid? Do you have a tap up there somewhere, which is at your beck and call? What is it with you women? Do you have to cry for every little thing? You know how to use it well though, because you use it to induce guilt; you use to win arguments; you use it to tilt us to your way of thinking.
5. This or that?
You will hover over something for eternity: this dress or that? Pasta or lasagna? Red shoes or blue ones? God, just pick up a damn thing and get over with it, will you? We don't have the patience until you match every piece of your outfit a million times and just when it seems to be coming together, change your mind and star all over again. We don't really care after a point of time. Yes, we want you to look your best, but we can't wait forever for you to make up your mind.
6. Hairy Harry
I know it is really hard for women. You have to do so much to look good for the men in your life. So much maintenance. I know all of that. But unfortunately that's how it is. We love you for a reason. And when at times there is hair on your upper lips or on your chin, it puts us off. Like you have expectations of us: chivalry, commitment, humor, sensitivity, hygiene etc, we too have certain expectations of you. And don't try to bleach your hair because it's not the colour of your hair that's the problem, it's the hair.
7. Meddlesome monkey
We also don't like the fact you interfere in everything we do: our hairstyle to our clothes to our drinking to the way we talk, walk, the channels we watch etc. Always remember, you chose us for a reason, so why try and change us now? So, please back off and give us some breathing room.
8. Tell us what to say
If you cook something and you ask us for our opinion, we are instantly in trouble. If we say it is good, you say we’re saying it for the heck of it. If we say it’s not so good, you will say we are insensitive and mean. If we say it lacks seasoning, you will make a face and tell us to take charge of the kitchen. Same goes with everything else: from the dresses you chose to something you paint or write or sing or whatever it is. Whatever we say, we are in trouble anyway, so you might as well give us a list of acceptable comments that we shall always follow.
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